Domestic Abuse

I’ve watched several friends stay in abusive marriages, and several divorce because of abuse. There are many reasons why people choose to stay in these relationships, though it’s hard to image why. I’ve listed some reasons at the bottom of this post, but lets attack the topic of boundaries for a moment:

We need boundaries. Without boundaries we will become victims of abuse and adopt a powerless mindset. We should have a standard set for ourselves of how we will allow others to treat us. If people do not treat us as we have designated, then we should not listen or continue in relationship. Here are some things that we should require, and reject, in relationships and conversations. These actions will encourage hope and self-control (empowerment), and help us escape abusive relationships. Boundaries cause the abuser to face the consequences of their own decisions while empowering us with the choice to leave if they don’t treat us with respect.

– 2 Chron. 7:14 – IF my people, my God-defined people, respond by (1)humbling themselves, (2)praying, (3)seeking my presence, and (4)turning their backs on their wicked lives, I’ll be there ready for you: I’ll listen from heaven, forgive their sins, and restore their land to health.

What we should require & reject:

  1. Humility instead of pride & arrogance 
    Verbal abuse, or other means of belittling you, should not be tolerated.

  2. Requests (prayer) instead of demands
    Use of fear tactics, physical abuse, or other means of control, should not be tolerated.

    God gave us dominion over everything but people. We need to respect others and protect their ability to make their own choices. If their choice is to abuse you, then you need to make the choice to leave.
  3. Seeking presence instead of things
    If someone wants something from you, without wanting a relationship with you, then its un unhealthy relationship. This should not be tolerated.

    If you are married and your spouse habitually has sex with you without trying to connect on an emotional level, it’s abuse.

  4. Turn away from wrongdoing instead of continuing to wrong you
    Refusing to change, though you respectfully ask and show them how they are hurting you, should not be tolerated.

Notice also that God waited for these 4 things from His safe place, Heaven.

– Heb. 10:26 – For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins


If you are in an abusive marriage, you need boundaries. Consider a temporary separation if you do not want a divorce. Once faced with the consequences of their choices, if they repent then go back to them:

– 1 John 1:9 – If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins

If they do not repent then divorce them:

– Rom. 6:23 – For the wages of sin is death


There are many reasons why people stay in abusive relationships. Here are a few:

– My partner will kidnap the children and disappear.
– My partner will spread horrible rumors about me.
– I’m nothing. I don’t deserve better.
– I was brainwashed to believe that I couldn’t cope without my partner.
– I’m more comfortable with what I know, than the unknown out in the world.
– My children will blame me and resent me.
– My partner will turn the children against me.
– My partner doesn’t let me out of the house.
– I have no friends or family to call for help anymore.
– I believe my partner when he or she says that it will never happen again.
– My marriage vows.
– My religion.
– I love her or him.
– My partner has all the money.
– My partner charges up all my credit cards.
– My partner will lose her or his job if I report this.

Other reasons why women stay in abusive relationships


Make a list of your reasons and confront them. Get out of the situation. There are churches, programs, and safe houses designed specifically to help you. It’s scary facing these reasons, but its wisdom to escape the cause of these abuses. Say no to the abuser and leave them today.

– Prov. 3:5-6 – Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight

– Ps. 18:6-19 – In my distress I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears. The earth trembled and quaked, and the foundations of the mountains shook; they trembled because he was angry. Smoke rose from his nostrils; consuming fire came from his mouth, burning coals blazed out of it. He parted the heavens and came down; dark clouds were under his feet. He mounted the cherubim and flew; he soared on the wings of the wind. He made darkness his covering, his canopy around him— the dark rain clouds of the sky. Out of the brightness of his presence clouds advanced, with hailstones and bolts of lightning. The Lord thundered from heaven; the voice of the Most High resounded. He shot his arrows and scattered the enemy, with great bolts of lightning he routed them. The valleys of the sea were exposed and the foundations of the earth laid bare at your rebuke, Lord, at the blast of breath from your nostrils. He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me. They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support. He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.

– Ps. 28:7 – The Lord is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him.

– Jer. 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

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Anxiety & Depression – Distorted Thinking Patterns

crazyMany of us have distorting thinking patterns. We haven’t yet renewed our minds. We have stinkin’ thinkin’ that keeps us in anxiety, depression, negativity, and sickness.

Below are 10 types of distorted thinking patterns.

Negative feelings come from negative thinking, so by monitoring your feelings you will eventually be able to figure out which thoughts and beliefs trigger your anxiety. The first step is to identify the trigger. Most people have thought these ways their whole lives, but God says, ‘Take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ (2Cor.10:5).’ Put your thoughts on trial, convict them, and reprogram them with God’s Word. The mind set on the Spirit brings life and peace. ‘Let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on the new nature created to be like God–truly righteous and holy (Eph.4:21-24).’ Your thinking is vital to your spiritual life as breathing is to your physical life.


Distorted thinking patterns:

think1. ‘What if’ thinking

What if I lose my job? What if I lose my home? What if my children get hooked on drugs? What if my spouse is cheating on me?

‘What if’ thinking breeds anxiety and fear. Sometimes this even turns into a self fulfilling prophecy. If you treat someone like they are cheating on you, they might eventually just start doing so. If you focus on ‘what if’, your fear grows. If you focus on God’s Word, your fear goes. Learn to replace ‘what if’ with what God’s Word says: God always causes me to triumph. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. If God be for me, who can be against me?

2. Catastrophizing

worryThe mind magnifies unpleasant events and transforms them into something more awful, terrible, or horrible than they really are. Making a mountain out of a molehill. It’s like spending $10 dollars on a 2¢ problem.

Like pouring lighter fluid on a flame, they use extreme words like hopeless, terrible, unbearable, devastating. These words fuel the anxiety. The only way to put out the fire is to eliminate inflammatory words from your vocabulary and replace them with more practical, realistic, and less emotionally charged words, such as unfortunate, inconvenient, or difficult.  Stop the drama. I choose faith-building words because ‘we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God (Rom.8:28)’. Practice this pattern of thinking until it becomes automatic, making it a habit and mind-set.

3. Habitually expecting the worst outcome

worryThey usually think if something can go wrong it will, and it will happen to me. ‘My boss didn’t acknowledge me today, so I’m sure she hates me and will probably fire me.’ ‘My husband is late for dinner, I’m sure he is having an affair.’

Realize that when you repeatedly think about something, you create the potential for these thoughts to become self-fulling. Especially if you treat someone as if they are already doing what you fear, it makes them more likely to go ahead and do it. Instead of expecting the worst possible outcome, begin to expect something good to happen to you. Confess God’s Word, ‘No evil will befall my family or me, nor will any plague come newer my dwelling (Ps.91:10).’ Expect God to do something good, and your faith will release a blessing.

4. Leaping to conclusions

needsThey mistakingly believe that they know what another person is thinking without having any facts to support it. They repeatedly and habitually make negative assumptions that fuel depression and anxiety.

You walk in a restaurant and find two friends eating lunch; you see them whisper and immediately assume they have abandoned your friendship and are badmouthing you.

Begin to identify when you are jumping to conclusions. Challenge yourself to expect the best of the other person. Instead of becoming anxious about things you don’t even know are real, determine to wait until you have more information before drawing a conclusion. ‘I am ever ready to expect the best of every person (1Cor.13:7).’

5. Black and white thinking 

perfectionismYou can’t see grey. You are probably a perfectionist that thinks their work is flawless or worthless. You see average as complete failure. You think first place is the only winning spot and every thing else is a loser.

This distortional thought pattern sets you up for failure, disappointment, depression, and anxiety. You will work endless hours to make something perfect, or will procrastinate and never finish because if it’s not perfect, you feel worthless. Also, if you struggle with perfectionism, you will need to watch that you don’t fall into the trap of comparisons. ‘Learn to be content with whatever you have (Phil.4:11).’ Quit focusing on what you don’t have, and start thanking God for what you do have. Choose to love yourself, forgive yourself, and accept yourself unconditionally, even if you make a mistake.

6. Unenforceable rules

nowTrapping in anxiety, they make rigid rules about what should, must, or ought to be done, and tries to put people in a box. The more unrealistic and unenforceable the rules are, the greater the disappointment. ‘They should stop cutting me off in traffic.’ Situations, people, and society aren’t usually going to turn out in your favor. The only should statement you need is ‘I should practice mercy and forgiveness’. ‘Love keeps no records of wrongs’, so I throw out my record-keeping book. Eliminate should statements and use I would like to or I prefer.

7. Labeling

‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me’ is absolutely false. We need to eliminate labeling words from our vocabulary, such as idiot, loser, klutz, failure, stupid, pathetic, pitiful, jerk. Labels destroy self-esteem, self-worth, and as a result many never accept love. ‘Life and death are in the power of the tongue.’ Choose to see yourself and others the way God sees them. He calls me ‘the apple of His eye,’ ‘His beloved,’ ‘His child’.

8. Negative Filter

capableThis person usually discounts all information that is positive. They discredit compliments. They remember mainly criticisms and negative information. They focus on the bad while the good slips away. These ‘pit thinkers’ usually overgeneralize, taking one bad circumstance and believing its it the trend of how your life will proceed. They use words like always and never. ‘I will always be like this.’ ‘I will never change.’ Stop using absolute words that set you up for failure. Try to enjoy the next compliment you receive. Practice eating the meat and spitting out the bones. Remember that God Himself forgives and forgets our failures. ‘Think about those things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy (Phil.4:8).’ Filter the news, tv shows, music you listen to. If anything falls short of every criterion, refuse to watch, think, or speak it.

9. Emotional reasoning

graceThis person feels like their feelings are facts. If they feel hopeless about an exam, they might not even show up to take it. They give up because their emotions make them feel defeated. The healthy thinker separates emotions from their overall self-worth. They realize that despite how they are feeling, they can change the outcome of the situation.

Realize that negative feelings are a sign that you are thinking negative, depressing thoughts. You need to immediately tune in to the thoughts or beliefs that are at the root of the emotion and simply change the channel of your mind to the one of gratitude. I will not be influenced by my emotions or feelings, because ‘the just shall live by faith (Heb.10:38).’ ‘Let us not weary in doing well: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not (Gal.6:9).’

10. The blame game

Many are stuck in a trap of blaming others or God. This creates a vicious circle of thinking and feelings that leads to anger, resentment, bitterness, depression, and anxiety. People with a victim mentality fit within this group of faulty thinkers. They feel like everything bad that happens to them is someone else’s fault. Blame locks you into the past; it prevents you from examining yourself, recognizing, and removing thought patterns and mind-sets that continue to sabotage your life. Learn to take responsibility for yourself, forgive yourself and others, and refuse to blame anyone. Forgiveness is a choice not a feeling. ‘Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.’ Refuse to rehash any hurt or pain.


mistakeTestimony: I remember when I started trying to reprogram my mind. Every single thought I had was negative. I put a list of these 10 concepts on my dashboard, and memorized them. I started pinpointing them and trying to refuse the negative thoughts. In the beginning I could hardly keep out a negative thought for a whole second. Just like any goal, you have to do some work. Lifting weights will wear you out, but the next time you go, you are stronger. You can work your way up to 2 seconds without negativity. Maybe you can start to think one positive thought; try to convince yourself that it is true. At least believe that God’s Word is true and quote those over yourself. Keep going! It’s been a year, or two, and I am completely changed. I can’t stand hearing a single negative comment. After coming out from under nearly 25 years of negativity, I truly have a distaste for it. I am free, positive, and know God’s plan for me is good. I can see myself through His eyes, and I can see bad situations through His eyes. IT. IS. SO. WORTH. IT. Don’t give up.

distorted thinking

healthy thinking


Worship: Emma, by Jason Upton: Trusting The Angels

facePrayer: God, thank you for creating us and saying ‘It is good’. Restore us back to our factory settings. Help us once again submit our will, ways, and thinking to your ways which bring health and wholeness. Thank you for being the great physician, our healer, and therapist. Thank you Spirit for being our counselor and teacher. Thank you Jesus for setting the example and giving us authority. Help us take dominion over our own minds and submit them to your kingdom instead of this world which bring such distorted thinking. Everything out from under your authority is in rebellion and chaos. We want to overcome the enemies of anxiety and depression. Go to this generation now and tear down the spirits exalted above it. Let the knowledge of you cover the earth as the sea. Stay the death angel and deliver your people from their slavery; free their minds. Bring them out of bondage. Let this generation x, that the world thought would be the dog, rise to be the head and not the tail. Bring transformation to their minds, and to the world. Wrap them up in a cocoon of your Words and see them through this transformation where they will no longer crawl, but sprout wings, in Jesus name, Amen.


For more on this topic get the book:

Bible Cure for Anxiety

Noah, the Flood, & Evil God


Noahs Arc   Peter drowning

The waters, of Noah’s flood, washed away the wicked. What kind of loving God would kill all mankind? He’s so harsh, right? Let’s look into this story and its meaning. Remember God is, was, and is to come; that means His Words, and actions, are without time – and the message stays consistent.


– John 1:1-2,4-5,14 – In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning…  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it… The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son

– Gen. 1:1-2 – In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

– Matt. 14:24-25,27-31 – When evening came, He was there alone. By this time the boat was far from land and was being thrown around by the waves. The wind was strong against them. Just before the light of day (or the beginning of day; the dark hours before daybreak), Jesus went to them walking on the water… But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him.

These 3 passages have similar components like: 1)God  2)on the water, 3)in the beginning, 4)at the dark of night.

So many people read the story of Noah and think that God wiped out mankind without giving them a chance, but these verses show us that, from the beginning of creation, God has been walking on the waters, looking for people to rescue. Since the beginning of creation, God has been hovering over the waters. When I hear the word hover, I think of a helicopter on a rescue mission, searching fiercely for those drowning.

Helicopter water rescueHover means to remain in the air in one place. This is God. He has His eyes on all the world. He is our dispatcher. Jesus is our first responder. Jesus says in John 12:49 that He doesn’t do anything on His own, but only does what God has commanded Him to do. Jesus is God. Jesus mission is to rescue.  He’s on the ground, er on the water, coming to the aid of all who cry out for help.

So why did God destroy the wicked? Let’s see what the definition of wicked is, so we know who drowned in Noah’s flood.

The dictionary says wicked means:
1. distressingly severe, as a storm
2. unjustifiable; dreadful; beastly
3. extremely troublesome or dangerous
4. evil or morally bad in principle or practice

Hmm… by definition it doesn’t sound like God sent a storm to destroy the wicked; it actually sounds like the wicked people were the storm.

– 2 Sam. 22:5-7,17-18,20,49 – Because deadly breakers engulfed me, while torrents of abuse from the ungodly overwhelmed me. Binding ropes from Sheol entangled me while lethal snares hindered me. I cried out to the Lord in the middle of my troubles; I cried out to my God. He listened to my voice from his sanctuary, and my call for help was heardHe sent for me from on high! He grabbed hold of me, drawing me out of deep water. He rescued me from my strong enemy— from those who hate me continually, since they were stronger than I… He brought me to a wide open area, rescuing me because he was pleased with me!… delivering me from my enemies. You exalted me above those who rebelled against me, delivering me from violent men.

– Prov. 10:25 – When the storm ends, the wicked vanish, but the righteous person is forever firm. (*We are in the storm right now)

We can surmise that wicked people destroy themselves. They are their own storm and since God gave us freewill from the beginning, he lets our freewill play out to the fullest extent. People have blamed God because it’s easier to blame God than blame self; we don’t want to take responsibility for our own actions and admit that we did wrong. People have also chosen to blame others instead of blaming self; Adam blamed Eve, and Eve blamed the snake, and I’m sure the snake blamed God for being loving and giving him the freewill to choose to do wrong! Granted, many of us are victims of someone elses wrong doing. I was. I was a long-suffering victim of many things. Family, friends, people without God, and people with God, all hurt me (I put part of this testimony at the bottom of this post). I had to hold on to God, take responsibility for my own life, and wait for the other side of God’s ‘Noah’s ark’ promise:

God can save the righteous from those who are wicked. God’s ways tell us to die to self, and not repay evil for evil, though that goes against every fiber of our being. God doesn’t want us to have to protect ourselves; we are His kids. He is our protector and He is more than capable of taking care of us.

Imagine you are the father to a child and someone just came up and slapped them to the ground. We gonna fight; you don’t touch my child like that. God, our Father, is the king of everything, and he is a warrior king at that. Don’t cross him. He can vaporize you in an instance, or worse yet, make you face an eternity of punishment…

But guess what. We are ALL God’s children. He says:

– Eze. 18:23 – “Do I take any pleasure in the death of the wicked?” declares the Sovereign Lord. “No, instead I would like him to turn from his sinful ways and live.”

– 2 Peter 3:9 – The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

God is waiting for every child to ask Him how to love. He is love! He is pulling out all the stops to show us love, but God can’t help us until we are willing to listen to His advice. That’s the definition of love: respect. God respects you enough to let you make your own choices. In Eden He gave us a choice, and everyday on earth is another choice. He will never FORCE us to do anything, and that should show you that He loves you, not make you think that He doesn’t care about your choices. He has given us His Word as our way to hear His advice on any, and every, topic. He is our loving, good, heavenly Father that is with us at every moment. He is not a wicked person who thinks he is supposed to control someone. Our Father teaches us right and wrong, then gives us the choice to make. This can cause us pain if we choose our own way:

Child touching stove eyeWhen dad says, ‘Don’t touch the stove or it will hurt you’, then we test it out and get hurt – that experience should drive us closer to our father, and show us that we can trust his advice.

Haven’t you seen a parent that was loving and wise, but the child was too rebellious to take their advice? The child put himself through hell before he finally realized he needed to take his parents advice. They had to face the consequences of their own choices before they could accept the wise advice of their parents. Their pride got the best of them: ‘I know better than my parents.’ Soon they realize, ‘My parents had more experience than me. I went through the same pain and trials they went through, because I was too prideful to listen to their advice. They were trying to save me this pain. They had a good plan and future in mind for me and I missed it.’

Every person sins. God does not destroy us because of sin. Those of His children who are willing to listen to Him and take His advice are covered (by Jesus blood). All His children will sin, but they will immediately turn to Dad and say, ‘I did wrong; teach me how to do right.’ These children are not wicked, or rebellious. They are God’s heart.

The people that God calls wicked, are those who are so prideful, that they truly think they can do no wrong, or have never done anything wrong. Those people will be destroyed unless they open their eyes to their wrongs, ask forgiveness, and turn from their wicked ways. They are hurting themselves, and everyone else, and they cannot admit that they have done anything wrong.

David had a son who tried to steal his throne. David loved him and did not want to punish him. Eventually, Absalom led an army against his father David, to destroy him. David’s commanders went out to battle and David said, ‘Be gentle with Absalom.’ In the battle the commander thought he knew better than the king, and he killed Absalom. When David heard this he cried, “My son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! I wish I had died instead of you. Absalom! My son, my son!”. – 2 Sam. 18

David is often used as a depiction of Jesus. Jesus told us to go ‘fight the good fight’ by sharing His love with every person. How dare one of us decide that we know better than Jesus, and try to cut down one of His children.

The disciples painted a better picture for us, on how to treat those living in sin:

Water is often thought of as representing sin. Think about baptism: we are dunked under the water, and it represents dying to sin and self. Then we come out of the water, and it represents new life, lived through the Spirit of God.

Jesus gave Peter the ability to walk on water, just like he gives us the ability to live free from sin. We are walking toward Him without getting bogged down in the mire. Peter (like all those who are walking toward Jesus will) fell into a bit of sin, started to sink in the water and cried, ‘Help!’ It says Jesus immediately stretched out his hand to catch him.

As Christians we are all called to live the same kind of life that Christ did. Jesus wasn’t trying to show off to Peter; He was trying to disciple him. We need to get out of the physical boat that we call religion, or the church, and realize that the physical boat can’t save us from the storm. Jesus is our spiritual boat; He is our salvation from the storm of sin. He wants us to 1)get out of the church building, 2)follow Him into all the world, 3)walk on the waters, and LOOK for those who are drowning, thrashing, panicking, and crying out for help.

– Gen. 1:1-2 – In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

Go out, into the dark places of sin, and be a part of God’s rescue mission. Noah preached to a wicked world for 100 years, and no one believed him. We have the same call, and I guarantee it won’t take 1 year for you to find someone who wants God. God is our true boat; there is safety in His righteous ways. Bring people into Him.

Fire fighter saving naked childBe gentle with the sinner (Absalom). It is hard to see underwater; it’s hard to know which way is up, and which is down. It’s hard to stay on top of the water when the crashing wakes of sin are beating you down.

Be the hovering helicopter with the search lights;  be the hand that helps them up and brings peace to the storm. Get out of your place of comfort, where you think you are safe, and be the rescuer that puts his life on the line to save someone else.

Matt. 10:39 – If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it.

Are you so scared of sin that you can’t be obedient to God’s command to go out and help those who need help? If your first response to seeing the firefighter photo was, ‘I thought this was a christian blog; why is she showing a naked person?’, then you might want to check your heart. God’s call, not to look with lust, is serious, but if it keeps you from seeing a person in need and doing everything in your power to go to them where they are, and save them, then you don’t have love. Anything done outside of love is worthless to God (1 Cor. 13:3). And if you’re scared that the second you look on a naked body you will lust, then your heart isn’t that pure is it? Don’t lose your life:

– Is. 43:2 – When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you

We aren’t going to the waters of sin to drown in it. We are passing through the waters to save people. It is hard and you might sink a little, like Peter, but God will never leave you or forsake you; and He is more than capable of getting you back up. Don’t fear for your life. Put your trust in God to save you from sin.

Worship: Oceans (Where Feet May Fail) by Hillsong United


Thank you God for putting your life on the line to save us. Thank you Christians who put your life on the line to save us. Thank you cops, firefighters, and first responders for putting your life on the line to save us. Thank you for seeing the worth of a person above your own fear of sin, waves, fire, or trials.

Sacrifice 
Jesus on Cross


Personal Testimony:
I made the decision to give God my life in the 5th grade. I didn’t have anyone to train me in His ways, so I lived the same way a non-Christian would, except that I was reading the Bible for myself. In 6th grade I read about the gifts of the Spirit; I came across the scripture and had no idea what it meant. Most of the gifts confused me, but I understood what a miracle was, and that sounded nice, so I asked Him what the others meant. Several years later, in 9th grade, I had planned out my suicide. I was tired of my lot in life. I could’ve blamed God, but God gave me a home; my parents lovingly adopted me. God is love, and everything that comes from love, comes from Him. Everything that’s bad comes from sin (outside of the plan of God). My parents weren’t perfect, nor was my birth mother; they had their own struggles. It wasn’t my fault, but I had to suffer through it. One was driven to drinking and abuse. A hard life drove the other crazy; schizophrenic to be exact. My life was hell for many, many years, but theirs had been too. I love them very much, and forgive them, but I had a lot of pain at that time, so I was sitting in the place where I would kill myself; preparations at hand. No one was there, but as I shut my eyes to cry, I saw Jesus. He walked up to me and placed His hand on my head saying, ‘Peace be still.’ This overwhelming peace flooded me. Every other thought was silenced. I told him, ‘God, I have nothing to live for but you. As long as you are in my life, I’ll keep trying.’ I walked away that day, but a month after that the thoughts came back. I had a string of suicidal thoughts, about the length of my testimony to this point. I was just about to leave for church, so I went and tried to stuff them down. I went up for prayer after the teaching, and before I had spoken a word, the 15-year-old girl (who had been preaching) opened her mouth and repeated verbatim – word for word, sentence by sentence – the full length of the thoughts I had thought. She then rebuked the evil spirit behind the thoughts, and prophesied God’s good purposes over me. 1)I had been alone when I thought them, 2)I had not said them outloud (they were thoughts), 3)I hadn’t told anyone about them – and yet this girl knew exactly what they were. Freaked. Me. Out. Just like God proved I wasn’t alone the 1st time, God showed me again in this 2nd instance – I AM with you. God came Himself the 1st; and the 2nd, he came through a person. This is the gift of prophecy; the ability to HEAR God’s voice, through the gift of the Holy Spirit (who is God).

Miracle of the Red SeaHow did I know it was God and not the devil? Well, I sure as hell knew it was something! But the Bible also says, 1)the gifts of the Holy Spirit are for every man, and 2)the devil doesn’t work against himself. Satan was trying to get me to commit suicide both times. He would not have interjected a vision of Jesus or a prophetic Word from Jesus that 1)lined up with scripture, 2)immediately kept me from killing myself, and 3)strengthen my relationship with God. As far as I was concerned, there was no question in my mind whatsoever that there was a God; this was solid proof.

God tells us that he never leaves us or forsakes us; He is always with us. Reach out to Him; He is speaking. How can we as Christians pray, and be mad at God because we don’t hear a response, while many of us have disowned Christ (the Word of God), which says the gift of prophecy is a gift for every man to help us hear His voice?

– Matt. 23:29-32 – “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You build tombs for the prophets and decorate the graves of the righteous. 30And you say, ‘If we had lived in the days of our ancestors, we would not have taken part with them in shedding the blood of the prophets.’ 31So you testify against yourselves that you are the descendants of those who murdered the prophets. 32Go ahead, then, and complete what your ancestors started!

Meant for “bigger things,” Scuffy the Tugboat sets off to explore the world. But on his daring adventure Scuffy realizes that home is where he’d rather be. 'Home is where the heart is.' My heart is in God, and God's Spirit is in me; home sweet home

Meant for “bigger things,” Scuffy the Tugboat sets off to explore the world. But on his daring adventure Scuffy realizes that home is where he’d rather be.
‘Home is where the heart is.’ My heart is in God, and God’s Spirit is in me; home sweet home

Prayer: God, I understand that we are all sinners, and I have many things to relearn about you and cause to come into alignment with your Word; but helps these who are hurting and asking to hear your voice. Deliver your righteous ones from the sins of their leaders. Remind us of your word to test every spirit, and taste every word that is spoken, to see if it lines up with who YOU say you are. Strengthen us to search you out, so we can see for ourselves how real you are. Raise up those working by the Spirit of God, though the workers be few, for a sign to all the world. We will be mocked, beaten, and called heretics, but so was Jesus. You, God, were rejected by the world and the church leaders (Pharisees). Don’t let me stay in the physical sinking boat of religion, trying to save my own life. Give me the power of your Spirit to walk on the waters and rescue those drowning. Don’t let it be said of me that I didn’t preach for the 100 years of my life, trying to pull people out of the flood waters. You are my boat, and you live in me, which makes me a boat. You do the steering; just help me be willing.


I’m working on a multi part blog about the Holy Spirit. I hope to make it fully comprehensive about who He is and what He does. You know the fruit of the Spirit is love, and love is God; we need the Holy Spirit. Nonetheless, I’m not through writing it yet, so here are some resources to help you find out more in the mean time:

Highlands Sermon Series – The Holy Spirit
Riches in Humility, by lovedisciple

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